If anyone should know about sexy time, it’s the place that employs the likes of Bill O’Reilly — which must be why Fox has created its very own list of “Eight Sex Myths You Should Not Believe“:
MYTH #1: A female is not a virgin if she does not have a hymen.
Candy says: So I didn’t really lose my virginity straddling the swivel chair at McDonald’s? Phew!
MYTH #2: Men are more visually stimulated than women.
Candy: That IS a myth. Nothing stimulates me more than a “Shoe Sale!” sign.
MYTH #3: Only women can have multiple orgasms.
Candy: Great, take away our only claim to fame.
MYTH #4: Being uncircumcised is unhygienic.
Candy: While not unhygienic, it is often mistaken for a Shar Pei.
MYTH #5: A woman must be in love to climax.
Candy: I’m quite certain that myth died the same year as poodle skirts.
MYTH #6: Men do not have sensitive nipples.
Candy: However, it’s still not clear why men have nipples at all.
MYTH #7: A woman must have an orgasm in order to conceive.
Candy: If that were true, Saddam Hussein would not have had so many children.
MYTH #8: Men’s members need to be handled with care.
Candy: Obviously, the researcher never had a girlfriend with braces.
No. 4: Men who are uncircumcised give women more sexual pleasure!!!
No. 8: You can break a man’s erect penis. I’m telling the truth…it happened to Dennis Rodman.
April 8th, 2008 at 7:10 pmMYTH #5: A woman must be in love to climax.
Wait, that’s not true?? I could have been whoring it up all this time??
Oh wait, I have been.
April 8th, 2008 at 7:27 pmDennis Rodman deserves to have his boner broken.
April 9th, 2008 at 1:48 pmMaybe you’re the one who broke it!!!
April 9th, 2008 at 9:37 pmAunt J is visually stimulated by a short stack, if you catch her drift.
April 10th, 2008 at 12:55 pm