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Welcome to the ninth edition of He Said, She Said, a column in which Candy’s resident life coaches field readers’ most pressing e-mails with their hard-earned wisdom and street smarts.
DEAR BARRON AND SURI:
My mommy looks like Ronald McDonald, only with more make-up and fewer Happy Meals. How can I tell her clowns scare the bejeesus out of me without hurting her feelings?
Max_Bratman@hotmail.com
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Dear Max_Bratman:
BARRON: My daddy says feelings are for losers. Tell her if she doesn’t cut the clown act, she’s fired!
SURI: Count your blessings. At least she doesn’t make you sleep with a stuffed alien.
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DEAR BARRON AND SURI:
Our mommy is pimping us out on a reality show, but we don’t want everyone knowing our potty-training business! Soooo embarrassing. We’re going to be the butt of jokes on the pre-school playground. How do we get out of this mess?
TheSheenSisters@aol.com
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Dear SheenSisters:
BARRON: A reality show? You’ve hit the jackpot! Now just pick a fight with Rosie O’Donnell’s kids and you’ll stay in the news for months!
SURI: Puh-lease. You girls don’t know what embarrassing is.
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DEAR BARRON AND SURI:
My hair is longer than Rapunzel’s, but neither of my parents seem to care. Should I just cut it myself?
RyderRobinson-Hudson@yahoo.com
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Dear RyderRobinson-Hudson:
BARRON: Yes! Parents love it when you do that.
SURI: When both your parents copy your hairstyle, THEN come talk to me.
I love this. More please!!!
May 1st, 2008 at 1:34 pmMaybe it’s the photo, but is Suri developing wonky eye?
May 1st, 2008 at 3:34 pmThere`s an alien inside her eye and it`s trying to get out.
May 2nd, 2008 at 7:50 amMid: I just can’t stop giggling about your comment! Those pesky thetans get everywhere don’t they? *snicker, snort, snerk*
May 2nd, 2008 at 9:16 am