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Because going through airport security isn’t nerve-racking enough, bigger airports are going to start using body-scanning machines that let security personnel see what yo’ momma gave you.
As for smaller airports? They’ll just make you go naked!
The Transportation Security Administration (TSA) has started using body scans on randomly chosen passengers in Los Angeles (oh, great), D.C., Baltimore, Denver, Albuquerque and at New York’s Kennedy airport. Airports in Dallas, Detroit, Las Vegas and Miami will be added this month.
The TSA says it protects privacy by blurring passengers’ faces and deleting images right after posting on the Internet viewing. Yet the images are detailed, clearly showing a person’s gender. “You can actually see the sweat on someone’s back,” a TSA director said.
Translation: They’ll also know if someone’s been skipping their Brazilian appointments.
Oh yeah, I’m sure the people will be “randomly chosen”: “Um, ma’am? Could you go through the scanner again? This time walk a little slower. Great, thanks, but we need you to go through again and walk sideways with your arms raised above your head. Thanks, but we still seem to be missing something. Could you go through one more time, and bend over…?”
Frickin hilarious! Scary too…
June 6th, 2008 at 12:07 pmthats going to be fun. road trip?
June 6th, 2008 at 4:25 pmThink of the jokes you could play on the x-ray guys. Like putting kolbassa in your pants. Or a big fake turd.
June 6th, 2008 at 4:36 pmLOL! A kielbasa in my pants! Thanks Jenn!
June 6th, 2008 at 10:12 pmDo it! I’ll give ya five bucks.
June 7th, 2008 at 3:25 pmTen for the fake turd.
June 7th, 2008 at 3:26 pmSounds like a fun idea Jenn. I feel bad for that poor lady. I would be mortified if I was put up on the internet like that.
June 7th, 2008 at 5:44 pmJenn.F. = brilliant. LMAO. A joke shop dog turd would be excellent. A pair of comedy plastic tits would also be amusing. Especially if worn by men.
June 7th, 2008 at 7:11 pm